Sooooo….. I got my wisdom teeth pulled yesterday. Besides the fact that I am stoked on jewelry ideas to do with my teeth I have a diet restricted to liquids. (also no smoking) and I expect to become such an angry bitch in the next couple days….

This is total shit. I eat and cook like a mad man, so this diet has become a personal hell of intense boredom of soy yogurt and protein shakes. But then….. When all hope was lost. I found our puree machine!

So I whipped this up from leftovers and things around the kitchen but it turned out to be fantastic and I could eat it! Take that oral surgeon and your lack of creativity! 

(this is a one time made recipe so feel free to alter/experiment/change/ or whatever. Lemme know what you think!)

About two parts cooked red lentils (I always cook mine over caramelized yellow onion and sliced garlic cloves) and one part cooked short white grain rice. Heating this and mashing it into a finer paste and mixing in a bit of minced tomato and a couple spoon fulls of butternut squash soup to cut down the starchiness and easier to swallow. 

In a small frying pan, heat just a little veggie oil and add in about 3 full washed and finely chopped kale leaves. Once it wilts add a large sliced glove of garlic and let it brown up. Pull out that small blender and add the kale mixture, some sauteed shiitake mushrooms (fresh from the asian market. I was in heaven), two tablespoons of both coconut oil and veganaise, fresh cilantro to you’re liking and puree till its as fine as you can get it. Replace the contents back to the small frying pan and over a low heat melt some soy butter and a tablespoon of water so it wont stick to the pan. Heat up the kale mixture and add a pinch of salt. 

In a bowl put lentil mixture, (I like to add cholula here but thats up to you), from out a shallow hole in the center and add call mixture, a pinch of paprika and a couple sprigs of cilantro fro show. Enjoy my fellow non-swallowers!